Saturday, 22 December 2007


sometimes i wonder if i did something wrong to deserve this
sometimes i wonder if i could have stopped this
sometimes i wonder if i wanna carry on
sometimes i dont wanna take my tablets
sometimes i dont wanna take my blood
sometimes i wanna eat chocolate
sometimes i dont wanna see the doctor
sometimes i wanna wake up and run
sometimes i cant be bothered
sometimes i wanna SEE my friends
sometimes i want my independence


Wednesday, 19 December 2007

Best friends in the world

I now i kinda said it in the last video but i was a bit blurred... i have been so touched my the support i have had from family and friends.. i would not have been able to cope without them ALL..

The hardest part to deal with has been the emotionall side.. the pain to some extent can be controlled and to be honest i am so used to it now..

but its the stuff in my head that hurst the most.. noy being able to do what i want when i want as my body just does not allow me to do things ..

thats when i can count on my friends and family to help out... coming to see me all the way from bromley and driving back the same day..

CHRISTINA i knowyou wont read this as you and computers dont get on, but you have been amazing and your support well i cant put into words...

i cant mention everyone but you all have been influential in your own ways in helping me deal with this pants situation..


so god damn emotional

It cant stop welling up at the mo... i was gonna put a video on but i keep on blubering... turned into a right girl....

well i have had a few good days but feeling so tired .... i cant even walk down the stairs today
without being out of breath...i could sleep all day but i wont...

sent off my papers and stuff for disablilty living allowance, work has given me my last pat packet from them still waiting for someone to get back to me regarding PHI insurance...

soon be xmas though hoping next year willbe better than this...